We are spending the next 2 weeks preparing our hearts and minds for both Thanksgiving and Adent.
As a way to reflect upon our extreme THANKFULNESS some of the members of:
will be sharing their testimonies.
Feel free to join our free online Bible study group. We would love to welcome you into our”family”
We are SO thankful that our God forgives and restores!!!!
When I was in my early teens I knew I was a daughter of God. I was very close to my Heavenly Father and I knew He had big plans for me. He was guiding me to attend a Christian college and even to serving a one year mission for the church. I looked forward to my future. I couldn’t wait to find my husband that I was sure to meet along the way. We would be married and have four children. We would go to church together every Sunday. I would have the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom and a loving, attentive wife.
Well, I did get married, four times. I even have four children — three girls and a boy. I was pregnant at sixteen and married at seventeen. My oldest two daughters were from my first marriage and I was fortunate enough to be home until after my divorce.
My son and youngest daughter were from husband number two. My son came after my first marriage but before my second marriage. My daughter was born after I separated from my second husband. Are you following me?
I was sure that husband number three was finally the right husband for me. I had my tubes reversed so I could give him a baby or two that he could call his own. I did get pregnant and ended up having a tubal pregnancy. We lost our only chance of a baby, and he found a new woman at work to “talk” to.
I went on to marry husband number four, although I broke up with him once while we were dating knowing we were not a good match for each other. I was so great at convincing myself and everyone in my life that I was doing the right thing. His extramarital affair with his “go-to girl” was my personal rock bottom – the only time I’ve truly contemplated suicide.
I’m surprised that my picture isn’t next to the definition of the word “sinner” when I do an Internet search. I no longer believed that I was a child of God. My life had been a cycle of making poor choices, followed by some pretty horrible consequences. Did I mention that I had two DUI’s during my past crappy life cycle? Yep! It’s true…I don’t think I can cross the border into Canada yet.
My most recent ex-husband can’t be blamed for me contemplating suicide. He doesn’t even realize that I considered that an option, unless he’s read my book. Good things came from my rock bottom night. I wrote my first book, “The Unfair Affair – How to Save and Strengthen Your Marriage, or Move on With Confidence, After Infidelity” and became a Certified Life Coach. I do affair recovery and wellness coaching because I know from personal experience what it takes to pull yourself out of the deepest, darkest hole there is to create a new, improved story with a much happier, healthier ending.
The best part of my rock bottom: I realized that I still have a Heavenly Father who loves me! He knows me better than I know myself and He still has big plans for me. He knew I couldn’t do one more thing without His help. When I was lying on the bedroom floor, I cried out to God. I told Him I was done. I was too tired to make the next move. It was then that He lifted me up. And when I curled up under the covers in bed, I could feel and hear Spirit or Holy Ghost whispering to me that I would never be alone again.
I used to be so ashamed and humiliated for the crappy life cycle I put myself and my children through. I don’t want you to think that my ex-husbands were the only ones to blame. I made plenty of bad choices all on my own. I feared the judgment that was going on behind my back. I shrunk when people made comments about how many times “so and so” has been married (gasp!) because I could always one-up them.
It took some time but I finally learned to look in the mirror, literally, and love the reflection staring back at me. She was, and still is, worthy of better. She deserved then, and still does, to be loved, cherished, and respected.
I have forgiven myself for my past. I’ve forgiven my ex-husband number four and his “go-to girl”. I still have some forgiving to do, but I want to take the time to do it right. Most importantly, I have asked for forgiveness from my Heavenly Father. I was really scared that this divorced girl was going to be handed a one-way ticket to hell because of the many sermons I’ve heard saying it is so for divorced women. Why would I want to keep on living, loving, and serving others if my only hope is hell? God kept me around for a reason and I believe He has enough room in heaven for one more.
I want you to know that if you’re reading this and believe there is no hope for you because of your crappy past or present, don’t give up! There is hope and your Heavenly Father loves you unconditionally. He wants you to forgive yourself and your past so you can look in the mirror and love the reflection staring back at you.
Happiness begins with you. Joyful living begins when you make yourself a priority and take care of YOU. Remember to always live your life well from the inside out.
Wendy Kay, Affair Recovery and Wellness Coach
Wellness with Wendy, LLC